


Stars and Sunshine

by Yorukaaa



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Fluff, Freeform, Human, M/M, Toronto
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-31
Updated: 2020-06-12
Packaged: 2021-02-26 16:29:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23412952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yorukaaa/pseuds/Yorukaaa
Summary: An employee in a game developers' company, Kiku Honda has seen not much since his escape from the school system; annoying co-workers and a hopeful career of art and staying in in the morning makes him smile, just a fraction. But when he gets to know the Greek pet shop owner arriving near his apartment, he might see more of what the world has to offer.
Relationships: Canada/Cuba (Hetalia), Greece/Japan (Hetalia)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 6





	1. Barking mad

Pochi was a _very_ excitable black, fluffy dog when hungry. Kiku stretched his arms as he opened his front door and found his pet circling him with bounces, like a children's game he wasn't let in on. He found it amusing but he didn't show, as he hung up his coat and hat, getting changed into his casual outfit. 

"Don't chew at my storyboard." He joked slightly, walking to the kitchen and filling the dog bowl with Pochi's name engraved in it, bright pink. It also had a cute watercolour painting of him as a puppy. Mei, a cousin who cherished him, sent it to Kiku, though he wasn't used to presents and spent fifteen seconds trying to make a conversation about it. He frowned at the lessening rattle of the bag, realising it was nearly empty. Pochi, meanwhile, devoured the remainders. "How long has it been since I refilled?" He looked at the other empty bags stuffed in a small bin bag, sitting sadly in a corner of the shelf. 

The kitchen itself wasn't really that messy. The windows were bright and allowed Kiku to see the streets as people got on with their day, the floor was always swept and mopped clean and the fridge was at least stocked with enough food for two days. Albeit, food that wasn't typically healthy. However, he felt it his strongest need to feed Pochi at that moment, as he was leaving him for longer hours at work and longer hours alone with every "chew toy" in Kiku's bedroom. Not only that, there was the issue of him being lonely. 

Nonetheless, he shook those thoughts away from him as he turned to put his coat on again and head outside, attaching a lead to Pochi's collar and setting off. It weighed him down to walk all the way to the pet shop. He could grab a bus, but he bristled at the very notion of staying put in cramped places where he'd be close to all sorts of people. The sun peeked that day, showing the bright paths and Pochi's glossy coat. Kiku bent over at all the walking and suddenly stopped as Pochi's barks filled the near-empty road. "What? What's the..." He turned and saw a pet shop across from him, with Pochi's favourite brand on the window. Of course he'd notice that. His nose was incredible indeed. 

It looked a little bit idyllic, with multi coloured paw prints on the walls and hanging fairy lights themed with the approaching Christmas. The growing October chill blew at Kiku's head one last time before the door shut with a satisfying click! He picked up the extra large portion and tried to calm Pochi down. Regardless of the situation and relentless, the dog barked loudly. 

"Excuse me sir, can you calm down your dog?" He was met with a green-eyed man while Kiku came came to the counter. He was in an apron and looking slightly annoyed at the disruption. Launching into a well-rehearsed panic, Kiku tried to calm down Pochi, resulting in only a little decrease of the noise. "He's riling up Athenia." He huffed. He motioned to the snowy white kitten which looked up from its position of safety on the top of the man's head. Its big blue eyes distracted Pochi momentarily, enough for it to shut up completely as it sat patiently. "Good boy." Kiku whispered. Pochi wagged his tail happily and nuzzled his leg. Kiku made a mental note to not let him near any cats for the time being. 

Kiku took more time to face the shopkeeper while he began to introduce himself. He looked at his messy black hair and necklace. Then, his eyes drifted to his chest and well-built structure. His sight lingered on his arms, a little impressed and slightly turned on before immediately looking back up, a little bit bashful that he was attracted so easily. It wasn't his fault the shopkeeper looked visually appealing. "I... Um, I'll pay by debit." He stuttered, beginning to increasingly desire to flee at any given chance from this awkward endeavour. A soft beep came from the card while he retracted his shaking hand. The shopkeeper stared at him longer. "Athenia... Isn't that the Roman goddess- I mean Greek goddess of wisdom?" 

The shopkeeper took a deep sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Yeah. My mum was a Hellenist. This namesake is the goddess of wisdom, the heralded on in Athens," He gave a soft smile. "What's your dog called?" 

"Pochi." The dog in question cocked his head to one side at the mention of his name. 

"Doesn't that mean somebody who's pretty hyperactive?" 

"I guess... I named him after the name of a pet in a manga I liked as a kid." 

"What manga was it?" The shopkeeper leant on the counter, handing him his packet. "Naruto," He mumbled. "I also didn't know what else to name him." He looked down at the pocket rocket, his dark, wide eyes locked on the food Kiku was holding. "My name's Honda. Kiku Honda." He blurted out, after taking another look at the assistant. 

"Like the car?" His answer made Kiku feel smaller somehow, like he wasn't a shrimp. 

"Yes, you could say that." 

"My name is Heracles. Heracles Karpusi." His voice dropped at the last part. Kiku rocked himself on his heels. "Like the Greek legend?" 

Heracles gave a small smile at the ground which internally made a little part of Kiku melt. Instantly, another part of him built it back up. "Yes, you could say that." Pochi started whining and Kiku made a small bow. "I'm sorry, but I'd have to leave, I'll see you around here?" He opened the door. 

"Wait!" Heracles moved around the counter with Athenia still on his head, quite unbothered as he handed a slip of paper. It took a second or two for Kiku to recognise it as a phone number. "Call me." 

"Um..." 

"I'm pretty new here and I'd like friends." Heracles hastily explained, while Athenia looked over the two with a condescending face. "I'm not the type to be extroverted." 

"Neither am I." 

"Um, alright." Kiku shuffled out of the door, clenching the food and the paper tightly, his heart pounding at the jolt of electricity he felt at the simple touch of his hands. The clouds closed in on the Sun's bold rays and the streets dimmed slightly while Kiku hadn't noticed with the weird feeling in his head, lighting up everything for him. 

Two hours later and Kiku was surrounded by his figures and posters of various franchises and Vocaloids. He awkwardly nudged a figure of Luka as he wore his headphones, fixed to the computer screen. His job involved storyboarding, character design and game commands, meaning he worked quite a lot; also meaning he didn't often show his face and he liked it that way. Pochi was happily barking to whatever eurobeat song was playing calmly in the background and the navy strips of night were beginning to spill onto the sky. He looked down at the paper he had made several notes on, before drawing the rest of the plot for Chapter Two of said game. 

Creating such things was always enthralling to him. He loved getting to make what was an idea, somewhat real, as real as a video game could get. The main concept was a adventure epic, so he could let his mind wander over all sorts of places. He sipped his water bottle and chewed on a mouthful of pot ramen while he froze up. Not physically, but his mind had stopped working, with all the cogs jammed somehow. How? His eyes fell on the crumpled piece of paper that he had taken in such a stiff fistful. That man. 

Heracles. 

Once again, he thought back to where he found that pet shop. It was relatively new, as well as a five minute walk. Kiku frowned at how weak he was at not keeping up a pace for at least five minutes. He looked at his phone and without hesitation, turned it on and typed in the numbers with steadiness and impatience biting at him. "H... Hello?" Kiku asked, as the call was somehow picked up. "Honda!" Heracles' voice was about as collected as he was in the shop. It soothed Kiku inside. "Um, are you still working?" 

"I'm walking home, actually. The bus is a little late." 

"Where do you live, exactly?" 

"Where do you live?" 

Silence passed for a moment, despite the hidden anxiety of both parties. 

"Five minutes from the shop. In an apartment." Kiku sighed, sitting upright and toying with his chopsticks. 

"Oh. I live four times as far." 

"Do you often take the bus?" 

"Yes. I'd just like to relax all day." His voice was softer and mellow. 

"Agreed." Kiku smiled to himself. Somebody who felt like him for once. However, a part of him would never agree; working hard almost always resulted in a better life. "Heracles?" 

"Yes?" 

"Was this shop new? I hadn't seen it before." 

"It actually opened up last week." 

"Ah. I don't go out that much." Kiku shrugged, staring at Pochi try to bully a ball. "You don't? Where do you work?" Heracles' didn't seem to have a surprised tone, but generally unimpressed. It somehow threatened Kiku. "I work at a gaming company. I'm a developer on a new project, but I work mostly at home." He heard a sigh on the other end. "You seem so shy. What if you went out more?" 

"I don't like people. I was sheltered a lot." 

"Well, we're friends now, so you should be okay around me." 

"Friends?" 

"Why else do you think I asked for your number?" 

Those words widened Kiku's smile. He carried on jotting notes while the comforting noise of rain patted the roof gently. "I see." He was flushed now. No denying it. It was getting harder to focus on his computer and the ideas he had drawn up. He saved and switched off. Only the calm hum of the swaying trees outside and the shushed songs inside could be heard now. Pochi had now curled up, tired and well-fed. "Do you want to meet tomorrow?" 

"I'll be out of hours by eight." Kiku's shrug was small, but deep down, he was kindling the sparks of excitement. 

"Then it's settled." 

Heracles hung up. 

The words still repeated over and over in Kiku's head. 


	2. One too many cups, eight apples tall.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kiku and Heracles befriend one another and have a day off together from work. Mr Honda realises soon that he might be nearing an early conclusion.

"Delivery everybody! One for Im and two for me! Oh, hey Honda!" Mei was thrown off guard by his presence. She was the same as always, though her hair was done up and her curl was completely out, amplifying the cutesy demeanour. "You could have mine?" She offered the shake apologetically. "Though, I usually have two for myself, one strawberry milkshake and one expresso, but..."

"Mei, I'm fine." He put up an awkward hand. "And of course I wouldn't know you were there and all, but you don't get noticed often-"

"I'm fine."

Mei kept rambling and Kiku was afraid he'd have to speak louder. "He said he's fine!" Yong Soo slammed the table to get her attention. "He has a water bottle." He pointed out, which was uncharacteristically _helpful_ of him in Kiku's case. "Oh, sorry, then." She walked over to her studio, violently flipping open her laptop and doing all sorts of things Kiku didn't really understand. Either way, she was a great talent at her work and she'd probably move on to far bigger projects after this one had finishing touches. She was already part of a producer team she was leading for a film soundtrack primarily by a Vietnamese idol. They said she was humongous in her country, but Kiku wouldn't know. 

Kiku, like most people, became absorbed within his role a fraction of a second later, exercising the workaholic role he had adapted to aeons ago. The company was pretty small, but they were working on a horror-fantasy adventure with as minimal blood as possible. 

It was a break with supernatural comings and goings that disturbed the hero internally and physically. The script had been finished a while ago and they had a wonderful cast of upcoming voice actors. All there were to do were finishing touches. A.K.A finishing the marketing and correcting errors. The indev looked pretty okay though. For them, that meant the end was only a few days away. Kiku could see the end of his shift a few years away, while he grew impatient for seemingly no reason.

_"Then we'll meet by those two benches?"_

_"Yes."_

He sighed heavily while tapping the table with his pen. Like a camera flash, it dawned on him; **_how long till he sees this man?_ **The hours ticked away as he distracted himself with work, doing demos and overseeing other people's work. Being a higher-up often let you do that with no question from the others. His quiet nature let him pass by silently, like a shadow without an equal. Now he understood impatience. Somehow, he survived his miniscule lunch break and the still environment that he had surrounded himself by. His feet itched to see Heracles. Nothing except a new manga release or film release had made him this excited.

And that was why the entire room stared at Kiku run out into the streets with the panicked expression that he only had in frustration. "Did he drink my coffee?" Mei joked, before packing up her things. "See you tomorrow, Im Yong." He gave an energetic wave as they parted ways.

Kiku's feet was one of the only echoes in the street. He had two objectives: get Pochi, then see Heracles. A sudden pain clumping in his chest forced him to double over, gasping greatly. He was only a street away from where he had started. He stretched and forced his legs to jump into action. They were doused in flames as he leant on his front door, heavily panting, but trying to avoid attraction from passers by. He fumbled with the keys and swung the door, to see Pochi sitting there, with a cocked head, waiting for him. After fastening his collar to the lead, he locked the door and began the speedy walk to the park. The breeze was an occasional blessing. The sun was disappearing faster these days and it had dipped below the horizon when he finally saw the light from a lampost as Heracles sat with a fluffy parka.

"Sorry I'm late!" He made a quick bow, then cleared his throat loudly. "I came as fast as I could."

"I was actually quite early, so I spent the time looking at kids playing with a kite. They left when you showed up." He held his hand and shook it, making Kiku blush. "Do you come here often?" He asked, sitting with him. The proximity made him a little bit excited, getting to talk with the guy who caught his eye a mere couple hours back. "Hmm," Heracles paused to think, "I come here every once in a while, because Athenia is not outdoorsy, or myself. But, fresh air is important and my mother used to come here on walks with me. How about you?"

"I've only been here for a family picnic and a pre-anime convention meet-up." Kiku confessed awkwardly. Pochi leapt up between them and started licking Heracles' coat. "I'm sorry, he seems to really like you." Kiku gasped, trying to take Pochi off him, before Heracles put a hand up. "It's alright. I'm a cat and dog person!"

"Impossible." Kiku joked.

"It is! It actually is, you know." Heracles' smile widened as they chuckled a little bit together. "This is will be another fond memory here, the day I met Kiku." Heracles hung an arm around said person. Kiku was thrown off guard and leant his head on Heracles' shoulder unconsciously. "Thanks... Thank you."

"What meeting was it?"

"Um, we were dressed up for anime, actually."

"In a group?"

"Yes. It was a few years back and we mostly talk on Discord now." Pochi curled up beside them. A young girl with a dark ponytail looked at them briefly, while passing on, reminding the trio this was a public space. "Are they your closest friends?"

"Not anymore. My relatives at the project however, we're the closest as co-workers could be." Athenia had engaged in maximum puff mode inside the blessed safety shield of Heracles' coat.

"You don't seem the type to socialise." Heracles pointed out rather obviously, with Kiku lowering his gaze to the ground. "You're right." Heracles held him closer. He whispered, "So we're both the type to be quiet and snuggle." Everything was a tad blithe, if you studied them closely. It generated a peaceful atmosphere of tranquillity and ease. It made them both feel safe with each other. "Do you always go with Athenia?" Kiku pointed at the cat in question, who hissed rather quickly. Heracles sighed, then stroked Athenia. "She's the one remainder of my mother. I want her close to me as a result." 

Hearing that felt like Kiku's heart pit fall. This person, who was so warm on the inside once you sidled up to him had a moment where he was left without anybody to be loved by? Wait, this was too much emotion. They had met only once and he felt if his mind was truly that weak, he'd have to hammer the nail that had been sticking out of the wood for so long. "Did you have a dad?" He tried.

"Tch. I don't remember him well. He became more and more distant over time and I learned to live without him. I do have some valuable lessons from him, mostly teachings from Diogenes and Socrates. I always said "Why?" and my excuse was that I was employing the use of the Socratic method." His face was tinged with the emotion of nostalgia and he held Kiku even closer, to the point he was a centimetre away from the coat, as though Athenia wouldn't somehow mind. She simply hissed and delved deeper. Kiku stared at his unkempt hair and fiddled with it. "My parents were immigrants, though they tried as hard as they could to make sure I was Japanese and not Canadian."

"What was your experience like?"

He paused, then talked rather quickly. "Our family were Buddhist and therefore they were very peaceful and had a little statue of the Buddha and a place to pray when you wanted your son to get good health or good grades. I have a cousin called Mei, we got on very well, though she was fiery and energetic while I wanted to sit in and study. She did, however get me into video games, so I started setting my goals on that. I loved Mario Kart the most. My mother wanted me to be strong and a leader. I only failed her on that." He drew a breath with a shudder, while the winding concrete path became decorated by the odd pigeon and the grass became a deeper shade of turquoise as the sunlight dimmed.

"I like you the way you are right now." He looked at him with those enchanting and comforting eyes that shone with intellect from time to time. "You're very warm." He managed to suppress laughter.

"You're very warm as well. I like you the way you are too."

"I enjoyed this conversation. Shall I walk you to your house?" Heracles asked, making Kiku feel all sorts of things, but he forced them down. "Um, thanks for that. I'd like it." He gave a small nod and he pried himself from the embrace of Heracles. "Do you live alone?" Heracles asked. Kiku nodded to his dog, who wagged his tail and skipped along, "Except for Pochi, nobody resides with me at the moment." His chest was bubbling a little bit more. Just a tad. Surely it was just friendly relations? "I live with my younger brother. People often pretend he's invisible. Maybe because our elder was always outshining him." Kiku looked at a minor twitch in Heracles' jaw.

They were soon discussing their favourite philosophers. It soon turned Heracles had many thoughts that Kiku willingly let wash over him like hot water in a shower. Most were cat-related, but of course, he was a cat person and Athenia looked somewhat prouder while they chatted quietly under the dim stars and bright city lights. They found themselves at his apartment, though it was when he broke from Heracles' arm that he felt the fatigue of walking. A lone car zoomed by, leaving a rumbling echo outside, giving him a sense of solitude and peace from other bits of chaos in the world. The feeling was enhanced and a strange string of thoughts peeped out at the back of his mind the moment he took another glance at Heracles, with him. He was standing in this quiet moment with him."Let yourself in." Heracles smiled, just a little. A fraction of a second later and the peaceful emotions passed. Goodbye, for tonight. "Can we meet again at some point? I'm not used to many cafes, though I wouldn't know of any place..." He stumbled over his words while Pochi bounded inside. "I know of a chaotic place only... Run by some Italians."

After noticing Kiku's face pale, Heracles switched up his suggestion. "We could just stay at your place. You don't have Pochi being watched by anybody, right?" The man's eyes sparkled while he smirked. "That would definitely be great. Thank you and sorry for keeping you here."

"Don't be." Heracles shushed him. "I enjoyed the time." 

At this point, Kiku was thinking so wonderfully of Heracles; the calm stare, the gentle swinging his arms made when he walked and his clever thoughts. His hair and his eyes and everything about him. He was sure not much could go down from here on out. He was feeling excited about the outdoors and the evenings and the soothing night breeze that even - in Kiku's perspective - seemed to carry his hushed murmurs. He stopped himself and took a heavy sigh while he got ready for bed, Pochi curled up on the bed obediently. He stared ahead at the one blank patch on his wall, not covered with remnants of his introverted life. Was he thinking all of this too fast? Was he getting too excited? It was normal to be attached to people at first sight. Well, he hoped so.

Although it was scary, with one wrong move meaning this would be a failure, he liked the real life thrill.

Pochi yapped at his hand for a few seconds before finally settling down. "Isn't Pochi a bit of a childish name?" He asked himself, staring thoughtfully at the murmuring dog. "Well, I can't change the past." He smiled, then shut his eyes tight and was submerged in a world he wished was his. 

.

"You've never heard of this place?" Heracles asked while he held an arm around Kiku. The raven-haired man nodded as he took a curious glance at the doors of a restaurant trembling with laughter and music in the core. "I've been there a few times, but when I was younger," He went on, Kiku listening patiently as the drizzle glittered on the pavement. "It's very loud and cheerful 24/7." The streets weren't very busy, except for the odd jogger, or dog walker. Kiku held Pochi by the lead as he leaned on Heracles' shoulder unconsciously. "Vargas, the old guy who runs this place was especially close with my mother." He recalled, clenching his fists tightly, much to Kiku's discomfort.

"I... I wouldn't know. You know this place?" Kiku pointed out to steer clear from the saddening conversation, a bright arcade with several iconic game theme tunes tinkling away. "I come here sometimes. With... Friends." The words sounded emptier as he spoke. 

"You said you didn't go out much."

"I haven't played here in months and that time was partly for my birthday."

"So, going by that, I guess your birthday is coming up?" Heracles' eyes lingered on the arcade for the final second. "Yes. February." Kiku lowered his head like a drooping sunflower in the dark, while Pochi soldiered on. "The eleventh, to be exact. When's yours?" 

"Not now." He murmured. The awkward moment spanned out further. "Well, the place we'll be going to isn't far. It's wonderful, if you ignore the owner. I just go when he isn't around, which is my break." 

"Who's the owner?"

"Some..." His teeth gritted, "Bastard named Sadiq. His food is still great, even if it's cooked by his hands."

"Oh. So, you two don't get along." Kiku's voice dropped.

"Understatement." He spat with his eyes narrowed and facing the ground. 

"Is this it?" Kiku asked abruptly to avoid the descending heavy atmosphere. Heracles, who had looked lost in that world of his own, was startled and looked at the sign with unwelcoming familiarity. "Yes." He sighed, patting Kiku's shoulder. "My treat, okay?"

The restaurant was actually quite cosy, with patterned rugs under the tables for some unknown reason and sofas. The lighting was yellow and mellow, with cute messages in Turkish on the walls alongside menus. Heracles didn't stop for all that. He ignored the sights that made Kiku gawp. "Takeout, please." A boy with cropped hair and tanned skin strode to the counter with a bored face that only zeroed in on Heracles as Kiku stared ahead, intrigued and daunted. 

"May I take your order?" He asked in a monotone voice while stiffly probing the buttons. 

"Yes."

"New company?"

"Order 40 and 85."

"You aren't looking to sleep on him for the summer?"

"Credit, please."

"Hm. I see. Want to look good?"

"And you should shower more."

With a swift turn, his grip tightened on Kiku's hand. The door shut behind them. The gentle roar of the street awaited them. "It's to eat at home. It's nicer that way." He suggested, with his hand still clamped. Kiku turned to him with a worried face. Of course, he had been secretly trembling and if it wasn't his self-imposed constraints he'd run out of there. "Is... Is everything okay?" He finally stuttered while Heracles scoffed and glared at the ground. "Yep. Just my ass of a brother."

Kiku's eyes widened for the fifty-eighth time that day, while he stared at the ground and shuffled along Heracles' angry strides. He sighed, "Is that the guy you wanted to avoid?"

"No, I can put up with him. It's the fact I was with you that made me lose my temper." His words stabbed the raven-haired man in his thoughts, like an eel darting through a shoal of fish. "W... With me?" He coughed. This was too personal to speak about in public! Or was he overreacting-

Said Greek companion yanked him by the hand, forcing Kiku's blush and when he lifted his head from the depth of his thoughts, he saw the dizzying lights of the arcade. "Guess what? I'm a huge fan of arcades." Heracles whispered softly. The words tickled Kiku's ear. A small smile tugged at Kiku's mouth and that made Heracles slightly melt. Nope! He had to gather himself and beat him at Jetpack Joyride. He had a bet to make. 

"So, if I lose three out of five rounds, I have to wear these cat ears?" His mind was pacing up and down, shrieking at the possibility of wearing neon pink, furry headbands with ears attached. They were fluffy and they were soft to play around with, but he couldn't help feeling a little mortified at the thought nonetheless. "Aren't they pretty?" Heracles looked at him with an expectant gaze. 

"They're..." He coughed. "Quite interesting."

"I thought it would suit you." Heracles smiled, making Kiku feel partially queasy, while a small smile blossomed in the back of his mind. No way could he wear that! Unless it was a friend. A friend like Heracles? "You're on." He finally decided, after five minutes of thinking, which Heracles used to cradle Athena. He whistled a little, then caught Kiku's eye and started up the machines and the little sound effects from the music and the prison kicked in. 

Whoever knew Kiku Honda for a while, whether it was his mismatched and slightly shattered family, his internet friends or pets, would know he was a beast at arcade games. He had breathed them in as the comfort of the lights and matches took his mind off the impending loneliness obvious in school. Was he loser? Of course not, but he wasn't any better somehow. He wasn't a leader or a person who fought anyhow; he was honourable and would only fight if there was a surefire chance of him winning - even then he wanted to be polite. However, this was a world of gaming, a different place (or console in life), to be exact. This would be where Kiku built a different character of himself, a 'better' version of him. Gaming made him feel better about himself, but it did so much more.

So, so much more.

Which is why he was so good at arcade games.

And which was why Heracles was in no way prepared. 

Blue light flashed across the small man's eyes, his fingers flying across the controls and tinkering with them like he was subconsciously meddling with beasts in order to get them to behave. He knew this game well, he played it well and he could only take miniscule glances to see where Heracles was. 

Surprisingly, Heracles wasn't a complete amateur. This man also turned to games in his time of need and it showed. The so-called brothers he lived by were infuriating, so gaming took his mind off things for a bit.

Two different, very powerful forces had the same capacity and same level. Hence, after ten rounds, after five different games and after two breaks, their powers cancelled each other out. The damage was the same and there was a humiliating draw (humiliating in Kiku's sense, that is). 

"Well. I didn't lose-lose. But I lost." He sighed heavily - at least he think he did. "Hand the ears." His defeated hand, the one that disgraced him by failure, reached out to take the neon furry band, before submerged in confusion for a few moments; the Greek had taken it. Even more so, he had worn it. It looked rather flattering on him nonetheless. Kiku cleared an awkward lump in his throat with a cough yet it resurfaced again when he looked at him. His mind was pacing up and down in confusion, delightful, giddy confusion. For the first time, his heart sped into overdrive by looking.

"How do I look?" He asked. Kiku could only look with a hint of frustration, like how could he look so cute, why did he have to cock his head like that and how dare he ask him, because now he's breathless and he can't speak!

"You look positively different." He stuttered, before lowering his head. Indeed, his go-to way of opinion couldn't fail him now.

"Oh? Please, elaborate." Oh, he was the thinker.

"I think you look nice in it?" He tried, though the hurdle of words were looming above his tiny 165cm frame. He really wanted to say what he thought, he really did this time. He really wanted to and this time, his voice failed. His writing abilities vanished into thin air just looking at Heracles' beauty for the first time, as he saw his skin, searching eyes and calm posture. "I'll help you out." Heracles sighed with a sense of disappointment and humour, just to walk towards him a few paces.

_He closed the gap_ _between them both_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So for many reasons, I'm disassociating from George DeValier so I'm rewriting this whole piece. Yayyyy.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kiku and Heracles both reflect on whatever the heck happened.

Kiku's mind was dizzy. His flustered hands didn't know where to go, so they hung by his side. He was still locked in, so his mouth couldn't breathe. He was trapped. What freaked him out a little was that new walls out of nowhere were chasing him, as he reasoned they were made of mere shadows. However, the fear was there, the fear of invasion. "I'm sorry!" He gasped as he stepped out after two seconds. Heracles, calm and tall, took a small heavy sigh when he turned around to lead him out of the arcade. 

The dizzying music intensified, a million voices surrounding the gaming warrior. The steps he took became distorted as panic surged as a tidal boar, washing him of any sense to cling to. This wasn't well for himself. The queasy feeling escalated into a stronger fear, reminding him of that teasing word that wiggled into his head.

An Egyptian boy at his school mentioned it once. They were studying Islam at some point and he had put his hand up and proclaimed with a smile about the word on the board.

خوف_._  
_The fear that makes you run away, the whip that causes you to stay in the light and behave._

The walls turned into a dome and arched over his head. Tears formed, yet he lowered his head so he couldn't be seen. Something snapped and he stood still instead. Truth be told, he didn't like that kiss. He liked Heracles enough, but that kiss made his heart drop. Perhaps he was overwhelmed, or even sick that day.

Pain, pain, pain. He had to withstand it. Heracles would think he was weird.

He had to excuse himself, before he was lost completely in the panic and his words were drowned. Luckily, the man had turned to him as they walked into the clear side of the street, the sun trailing on his hair. "You don't like it, right? I've had enough experience." Heracles mumbled. He felt shy, though Kiku could feel the piercing glare from where he stood, with his head down. Blinking frantically, he responded. "I'm... I'm not used to it."

Athena hissed. She swiped at Kiku's trousers. "I'll cut her nails." Heracles smiled apologetically as he kept her close. At this point, they were a few steps away. They were close three minutes ago. They could feel each other's hot breath. They made each other react in more ways than one when they shared two seconds, two seconds where they couldn't be pried open. 

_It's just a kiss! Get over yourself!_

Kiku couldn't get over himself. He needed to think. He needed to step back, take a break in his room with Pochi and come back refreshed.

He wouldn't let himself do that. 

His vision tunnelled while he nodded again. His mind had ricocheted off into nothingness. He needed to be strong, he had to be able to handle this, or was he even able to be around Heracles in the future-

"I'm sorry, if I pushed you." The pull towards him was stronger now, but Kiku still stood rooted like the tree that loomed above him. The streets were filling, with people, sounds and dogs. Something about it flooded Kiku with shame as a side effect of his reaction. Shame that he didn't follow and shame that he enjoyed it, just a little tad. He couldn't think of anything for those moments.

"Thanks."

Heracles took down the ears and managed a small smile, the most he made that day. He stared at his friend under the tree outside the arcade and frowned afterwards. He couldn't let his face droop, it opened the gates for his brother's words to come in.

_"You aren't looking to sleep on him for the summer?"_

It rattled him somehow. It was a genuine question, since Heracles did have those times with friends, but he only did it to show them what it was like. He was really interested in Kiku and he could tell he was a repressed individual. The panic in his eyes that he tried to hide made him crumble a little in anger. It was very selfish of him. Kiku wasn't alright with it and he had to respect that. 

It rattled him nonetheless. Was it not okay? He should've asked first. But he felt something for the guy. It wasn't that emotional, as it was still at a first-sight basis. He was the new guy and he got excited. He should've given some sort of signal or waited for a go-ahead. Instead, he tried to make the moment his. His tongue felt slimy from trying to touch such a sweet man. Oh yeah, he wasn't a boy anymore. He just _had_ to act like one.

"Should we meet the day after?"

"Yeah, I'd like that."

And then they stepped away from each other, defying the pull of gravity.

"Heya, Kiku!" Yong Soo greeted as he loudly sipped on a milkshake. Kiku internally slapped himself. He knew the guy took this bus route home. "Hello, Yong Soo." He waves tiredly. As usual, Im Yong didn't get it. "Listen," he kicked back as they boarded the bus, giving Kiku a chocolate bar. "So you know your nephew, Leon?" His mind flashed to an image of the guy at a funfair. Oh, that geek.

"Yep." He coughed a little bit while the bus rolled on. "He's visiting here for the holidays, so he's staying with you." Im Yong casually announced, leaning on the window and flashing his photogenic grin whenever Kiku looked his way, in time, always. "What?!" He choked on his bar, just about keeping it in at the last second. "Apparently, he doesn't want to stay with me and Mei's going through the process to move here, so it's your place, just for a week."

"Didn't Mei secure a spot?"

"Well," He sat back, staring ahead, until looking back with wide eyes, "You know the house fire that occurred last week when some English dude was trying to make some cereal?"

"Let me guess, a boy she was babysitting? Kirkland's little brother?"

"Bingo." He pointed with finger guns.

"I don't have the necessary space, I'm sorry-"

"No." He put a hand up. "Yes, you do. You have one spare guest room."

"It hasn't been touched in years!"

"Quit bitching your way out. Leon only trusts himself for these things." Yong Soorebutted with a huff. Kiku stared ahead for a minute, while they travelled into the area where his Korean friend was going to be dropped off. He didn't want to be harassed, let's face it, so he reluctantly agreed. "Fine, I'll take care of him."

"Kiku, he's seventeen. He won't do much." Kiku took a deep breath and stared at him intensely. Did Yong Soo understand what he was saying?

He's done much, very much.

"Can I bring you to what happened between his friend Awangku and himself in my room?"

"That'll never happen again, he was twelve! I promise! He swore off sleepovers." He dismissed with a laugh.

"All my stuff was wrecked."

"And he paid for all of it!"

"I'm not risking the emotional damage!" He argued, before quieting after raising his voice. The rudeness had probably gone off scale. However, he was Im Yong's elder.

It was the reason he didn't like seeing others touch his cameras. Leon and that friend wanted to film something for a project and he agreed, as Yao banned them from going to the fireworks show. After all, they needed to turn in a project they negotiated to extend the deadline for, much to the chef's annoyance. As a result, he was banished to work on at Kiku's place while they went to festivities. Worst New Year's ever.

"If you do, I'll treat you to food at that Korean place." Without missing a beat, Kiku agreed. Anything was worth that expensive course. And food.

"Great! Just know he's finished his vegan year, so nothing to worry about!"

"Uh huh." 

And with that, they parted, leaving Kiku to be driven on by himself for a further, agonising ten minutes. He hated to be by himself on a public bus. Leon was coming over and he felt like he should be accepting. He couldn't come off as rude, but the kid liked to criticise him sometimes, or compare him to "Old Man Wang." He used to spoil things a lot in his house as a kid and he was lazy and didn't do much. He was nicer, but as he grew, he was more of a delinquent, but not that bad to cope with. 

At least the _fireworks_ phase was spent at Mr Arthur's place.

The cold air whipped about his neck as he left the warmth of the bus. It trundled on, busy throughout the day. It was noon now. He stared ahead as he walked, he didn't focus on much. He was still, he felt. Only his legs were lively. He went to the lift and while it rose, he looked at the floor, the tiny box walls blowing away into this empty world, a place where the only sound he heard was his footsteps. They echoed. 

Entering his place where Pochi bounded in made him shudder. Walking through those doors triggered him, triggered what he wanted to block out for a little while. He wondered why, _why did he freak out so much over a kiss?_ He felt pushed to do it, even if there was an inkling of enjoyment for it. He felt dirty for letting Heracles do that. Were they more than friends now? What the hell was he supposed to do?

He liked Heracles, a lot. But he got all sorts of signals from him. His eyes widened whenever he made eye contact with him and his usual poetic way of talking fell to pieces. He definitely liked him in that way. Would he call it love? More like infatuation. "A feeling like that never comes at the drop of a hat." his dad would say, "It's about the time." And Kiku believed. All the stuff he consumed, the stories and songs, they were a getaway for a reason. They were not real. He could get lost in it.

A dark bubble bobbed about in his head for room. It was something he concealed for a while, the fact he enjoyed getting lost in those things. But that kiss? That wasn't a getaway, more like a capture. All that thinking got him in a headache and he was still standing at the door. He promptly collected his senses and shut it, changing, then walking to the things he already laid out on the table. Red bean rice. It was a thing to treat Heracles and he was going to invite him over for it after their day.

His eyes wandered to the other end of the room, the living room with only a counter and a gate to keep out Pochi separating the places. Would that kiss have happened on that sofa, watching a film? He reddened at the idea. That was his problem. Kiku thought too much. He hated the act, but kept convincing himself Heracles didn't mean harm. He had to not mean it. Otherwise, it would've been a letdown of his life.

Thankfully, he wasn't in too deep. He could think clearly, so he could make a decent decision about it. He tidied away the food and set to work making curry. It was the Indian kind, though he could imagine his conservative parents tutting at it all. Kiku liked this kind. The Japanese version got too sweet for him at times, or maybe that was his mum's cooking.

He had to have a cup of milk on standby first, while he ate and ignored his crumbling insides. The rice was nice, but it was bitter in his throat. Everything was. His tears were bitter, his sweets were bitter and a hug from Pochi couldn't soothe anything. He was in too deep.

No matter what happened, at the end of the night, he had worked himself to sleep, fingers splayed across the keyboard and a fallen ice cream tub on the floor of his cluttered, silent bedroom.


	4. That cliche in the bathroom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just to let you guys know I still exist. Some things popped up and life happened and I deleted my Wattpad acc so I found it hard to get motivated to do some things again. I've found the courage to learn dance and do workouts, as well as learn languages and role-play more. It's getting better, I promis :D. I'm posting this tiny thing so I can see whether my readers still exist. I never like leaving shit up and not finishing it tbh.

"What's up, _losers?"_ He could hear the words come out, but Leon would never say such things to his lovely, silent uncle. So what if Kiku was a ひきこもり? Surely they were still going to have good relations, regardless of past. Thing is, Kiku just had to hide his tsunami of regret and reluctance that flooded him. And Im Yong promised him Korean food after this. Free food was free food. Instead, the seventeen year old kid walked in with pink badges and stickers all over his jacket representing cool idol groups he was into at the moment. He took off his shoes. He waved with a chill smile, "Good day, Honda."

Well, he was raised the gentleman.

**Author's Note:**

> For many reasons, I'm disassociating from George DeValier and this will be an original work now. There will be slow updates and I'll be rewriting life itself ;-;.


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